Wednesday, October 14, 2009

transformation of myself...

I realized that I am a perpetual project in evolution of self. Today I gazed outside my window and said goodbye to a favorite fabric haunt ...Jerry's in downtown Newark. Jerry is retired and the building is coming down for a parking garage is moving in for hopefully new downtown patrons and shoppers. The day was gray as if the universe is aware of inevitable changes in my familiar hunting grounds and I felt a sorrow of not knowing how these changes would affect me. Jerry's was a destination for all fiber artists who are in the state for some reason or other. Fabrics from New York, unusual cottons and exquisite laces and trims for a penny a inch... everything you might need for an unknown project. Jerry would bend over backwards to show us his new buttons and special designer materials we might just need. Each visit would be an adventure and the staff were family in helping make the big or small purchase. Farewell dear friends...I will miss you forever.

My transformation is like my hand quilting ...slow and steady one stitch at a time; marking the passage of time and leaving a simple but authentic sacred marking. When I am lost in my process I find a discovery of consciousness... cultivating consciousness gives birth to a new degree of integrity in self. The layers are overlapping as they equally unfold to reveal new meanings and metaphors for patterns in my life. It sometimes sounds too simple to be true and yet the obvious is hidden right under our very noses. I needed to rest a little more today but I am sure it is because of this sudden cold wave that has settled on us and I am not adjusting to it as easy as before. Cuddle up with someone you love and enjoy the changing of seasons tonight as I quilt my way to tranquility. Imagine and Live in Peace, Mary Helen Fernandez Stewart


  1. I find it so sad when the local stores disappear, especially the specialty stores. We lost all ours years ago to JoAnns and WalMarts and the like, with no service and no real content. Somehow, the whole era I grew up in, of specialized service and the availability of unique items is coming to a close and I am not at all adjusting well.
    Still fighting for credit with an online fabric company for fabric returned to the (almost $200)and had to spend $$$ to get a raft of paperwork to the CC company.
    What is right about all this????
    Where has America gone? (musing....)


  2. My favorite sewing store, Han's, closed last year. No long can I take a little one up there with me and show them the button drawers full of colorful buttons. No longer can I look at the new sewing machines and drool. Han's son, tried to make a go of it but people stopped needing buttons and they bought their machines at Walmart. Now, it stands empty.
    So, I will continue to spend my hard earned dollars at local small stores and hope that I can keep them in business a little while longer.
    Stay warm, it's so dreary and damp here in WI. :)Bea