Saturday, March 28, 2009

why I blog and why I read them....

I write on my blog to see my words and then dare to share them with others in search of a community where their marks and visions are free to just be. I have been reading Seth's Altered Page blog for almost a year and we "chat" informally about different collaborations like my latest "disintegration" project with about 100 other adventuresome artists. I enjoy creating work and the process with others even though it will never be in an exhibit for the world to see. Words are powerful and can generate a place and time for sharing in a spiritual communion. I guess I do not care if I am read but I feel empowered by putting my own opinions and fears out there in the Universe. I do believe this is a positive avenue for energies to be shared without a judgement call or a grade. It is like a photo... a moment in time.
Thursday at the gallery while I was a docent I realized I was bored. I found myself in admiration of Marilyn's watercolor class and her gosh darn dedication to spreading good news. Her students and Marilyn were engaged in an exciting play exercise of exploration. I know now that I am no longer needed except to do my work and support the LCA family. Working in the background is fine and I salute all those who are dedicated to growing and expanding our vision and mission. My dear Ken was watching both little ones and I would rather be there with them for this moment in time. Marilyn is off for an adventure in Art in California as I speak and I know she will come home even more energized with new ideas and inspirations to share. The work for the Spring exhibit continues to come in but honestly I have seen most of the work but Bravo goes out to Chris Lang's Mother Nature Chair in handfelted wool from her sheep. Kathy Anderson's newest painting vibrates in vitality on the wall and Melissa Panko's works need to be seen to totally appreciate. I need to refuel and refill my vessel and doing my work is my answer for right now. Please forgive me but I need to be needed and valued for more than just a clerk. I enjoy my outreach experiences and projects and possible exhibitions outside my comfort zone... do any of you ever have the courage to go where you might not be accepted but realize the risk taken is a reward in its own.
I am still mending and fighting my post procedure enormous headache...did they miss something? I have to trust that this is what is to be expected after this new method of saving the human brain. My vision still needs to show improvement but at least I can still see...fuzzy sometimes with no pattern or predictability as of 10 days later. Matisse... no I do not have a big head but I do find comfort in knowing he had to adjust...discovered new styles and techniques when he experienced the detoriation in his eyesight. Last night I made a "Danger Men Cooking" Curious George apron for Cole second birthday party today. They have a family night on Fridays where they all help to make a homemade pizza and now he is officially my special chef! Sewing at night is problematic but it was good to just not give in to frustration and a little "lack of proper vision" hold me back. I felt vindicated when I iron Curious George for my embraceable little monkey man!
Today we attended a two year old birthday party with three generations of family and friends uniting to celebrate the optimism a loved child can give the world. Bubbles, play dough, sugar cookies to ice or skip the cookie altogether and just eat the colors of icing right from the plastic knife! The children ranged from 3 months to 9 years old and the big kids... the adults had a good time if they allowed themselves to be free and play as an innocent child. Maya, Sabrina and Hannah went with us since their parents were working and just seeing them all playing and giggling together warms my weary heart by creating another shared memory for all of us. I know others who do not enjoy being with the young ones but once I lay the ground rules...1) no nose picking 2) no bleeding and 3) no vomiting...everyone can have a great time. I am thankful to Erin and Chance for sharing their moments here and now with everyone! Well I have been very verbose tonight but ...well that is just the way it is. I love so many things about my today and I realize our families hold the authentic key to our Happiness threshold. Imagine and Live in Peace, Mary Helen Fernandez Stewart


  1. I too am seeing changes coming in my life experience. I am scared and exited to possibly go outside my comfort zone. My biggest challange has been to realize that "no" is a word to be added to my vocabulary. I can choose where my talents are used. If I choose not to participate in someone's vision or project, the sun will still come up and we will survive...more rested and with more peace of mind. Please know that you are needed by those of us whose lives have been touched and enriched by your strength and encouragement. We love and appreciate you just for being you!
    God Bless, Vickie

  2. Thank you for your kind thoughts on saying "no" to events and demands as they continue to pull on my loyalties and my family. If I really listen to my heart's murmurs and recognize where I can fill my body; my vessel then in time I will feel the connection once again. Imagine and live in Peace, HI Mom! Mary Helen Fernandez Stewart