Wednesday at Goodwill...just a short visit...

Where did the day go??? I went out this afternoon for a quick stop at Goodwill and I found a wonderful silk...yes, I said silk mid-calf duster coat and a sleeveless shell to wear under it...perfect for further embellishments to maybe wear at the opening and all for $5.99 and then my 25% senior discount. I am already imagining how to recreate the flat silky surfaces. I found another Dinosaur book for my Mr. Cole and a few small crochet little hats and bits and pieces. The cashier asked my where have I been? I smiled and thanked her for remembering me. With the unemployment over 11% in our area so many more are checking out the Goodwill for children's clothing and household items. I also bought a small paperback all about Horses...research for a summer of sketching with the grand daughters. Life doesn't get any sweeter than having a search for simple joys in a Goodwill Store.

I went to the grocery and then came home to make some red beans and rice for supper and now I am back to being exhausted. Whew I am out of shape. Tonight I am back to work and I want to get to bed at a reasonable time in hopes of maintaining a regular routine speed. I sorted my pink beads and buttons for the April Pink Full Moon composition...tonight is the actual full moon but last night was a spectacular night bathed in milky moonlight and topped off with an actual frost. I am not complaining because I heard on the news that our country is having snowfalls in late April! My irises are budding and just about ready to open up. My Shasta daisies look like they are going to be prolific this May. I love these plants that come back with very little encouragement or coaxing. My daisies came from seeds given to me by a dear friend in Canton, Ohio. I remember Karen with each budding daisy for my dining room table and kitchen.

I am learning more about Eva Hesse and I find reassurance in the fact that she agonized over her personal painting processes and Eva fought to be anything but mediocrity in her brushstrokes. I feel her insecurities and can understand her need to write her own new chapter.
Her drawings are essentially quite free in an "ultra alive "mode. She was determined to fight to be a recognized painter and simultaneously she fought to be healthy. Eva had a series with loose, unattainable strings connecting with "cords everywhere" loosely holding the composition together. I can not articulate why these structures draw me in for closer observation because at the same moment there are elements of life's chaos and irrational forms become visible. During the 1960's when she was exploring this abstraction I was still in high school but these intangible connections spoke to me then and have been resonate in the threads, weavings, nets, fibers I have grown to appreciate for almost forty years. Circles, triangles and repeated patterns held her compositions together and yet appear to be so loose. "I would like my work to be non-work. This means that it would find its way beyond my perceptions. What I want of my art I can eventually find. The work must go beyond this. It is my main concern to go beyond what I know and what I can know. The formal principles are understandable and understood. It is the unknown quantity from which and where I want to go. As a thing, an object, it accedes to its non-logical self. It is something, it is nothing." Eva is own words are poetically attempting to expose her vulnerability and human frailty for all the world to see and possibly judge. I hope I have made some sense...my fatigue is catching up on me. Have a wonderful FULL moon night and embrace the pulls and energy of this ceremonial wonder. Imagine and Live in Peace, Mary Helen Fernandez Stewart